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The History of Toilet Paper” Blog 38 part 2 of me being inspired by weirdness.

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In the dawn of time before the birth of civilization, toilet habits such as the use of toilet paper and hand washing were non-existent. Man was a disgusting creature that went forth about his business with poopy paws and soiled rear ends.

It was a dark time, of the weird smells, greasy hair, skid marks in the trousers and folks only bathing twice in a life time, at birth and death. Sorrow was known as man quested for ways to be clean in the nether regions.

The Greeks, with their vast wisdom and knowledge of Plato and Socrates, used a sea sponge on a stick in a bucket of salt water. After “cleaning” one would leave the sponge on a stick in the bucket for the next person to use. The Middle Easterners used the left hand which is still supposedly considered unclean in that culture. In Europe, the rich used wool, lace, and hemp. The poor had more variety of things to use if less savory then wool, lace, and hemp. The poor used leaves, stones, sea shells, bits of pottery that were sanded smooth, the sand used to smooth out the pottery shards, corncobs, husks of fruit, snow, water, a hand maybe yours maybe not. One fellow suggested the neck of a well downed goose as well as oth and many other things.

The Chinese are credited with the invention of toilet paper, the first documented use of toilet paper in human history dates back to the 6th century AD, in early medieval China it was expensive to make and reserved for the rich interestingly to note that prior to the Chinese toilet paper one of the common items used for cleansing after voiding was something called a Chungi.



Seriously, does anyone have an idea on how one of these might be used?

The Chinese toilet paper wasn’t on the traditional cardboard roll that we are used to now. It was in sheets two by three feet size in packages of 1000, to 10,000. For the royal family it was super thick, soft and scented.
The rolled and perforated toilet paper that we use today has various sources credited with its invention as well as dates. So somewhere between 1877 to 1890 and either the Albany Perforated Wrapping Paper Company or the Scott Paper Company. My money is on the people at the Scott Paper Company.



Imagine, if you can the stock splits on Scott Paper Company since the 1800's

Today, the preffered color of toilet paper is white, and is available with or without quilts and perfumes. It might have a little lotion or aloe impregnated into the rolls for luxury and is expensive. Or the paper might be 2 ply, rough as sand paper, no design, no aloe and be $4.62 for a twenty-four pack and a bargain. It’s remarkable to me to see how much such a simple item as toilet paper has changed in thirty years.

In the 1960s and 1970's you pretty much could color coordinate your toilet paper to the color of your bathroom. I remember pink, lavender, pale blue, green, and yellow with quilts with flowers and other patterns on them. I got into trouble a lot for using the purple toilet paper to make gowns for my Barbie.

Civilization places a great deal of importance on toilet paper and cleanliness after voiding. Hygiene is what lifts us up above the animals. When the zombie uprising comes and the world is divided into them and us. Think about who you would wish to lead you... someone that can maintain some semblance of civilization or a tyrant warlord that uses pages torn from the classic works of Shakespeare to wipe his ass?
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Updated Jun 26th, 2012 at 02:26 PM by yarri

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Comments

  1. VEE's Avatar
    They invented what now? Why did nobody tell me?
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  2. thisonegirl's Avatar
    Lol, purple toilet paper gowns! How did I miss that the first time around?
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  3. LiamKerrington's Avatar
    Ok, NOW I understand why Zombies smell like shit ...
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  4. Duffusmonkey's Avatar
    When I was very young my Grandpa still had an out-house (in addition to modern plumbing).
    I asked him why there was a pile of corn cobs outside the outhouse and Grandpa said "Ever heard the expression ROUGH AS A COB?" Now you know where that expression came from.

    To this day I don't know if he was lying, I can't handle the truth!
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  5. thisonegirl's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Duffusmonkey
    When I was very young my Grandpa still had an out-house (in addition to modern plumbing).
    I asked him why there was a pile of corn cobs outside the outhouse and Grandpa said "Ever heard the expression ROUGH AS A COB?" Now you know where that expression came from.

    To this day I don't know if he was lying, I can't handle the truth!


    LMAO. My grandparents also had an outhouse, but they had toilet paper, too, lol.
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